Hello again!

 Randomly Selected Items from my Files:

Readers Digest:  RD

The Week: TW

Standard Times:  ST

Anonymous:  AN

Soggy Thumb

The next time you repot a thirsty plant, place a kitchen sponge at the bottom of the pot.  The sponge will act as a reservoir, absorbing and holding any excessive water to feed back to your plant the next time the roots are a bit parched. (RD)

HI!

A Deerfield, Florida city employee was reprimanded for not saying "Hello" to the town mayor, as they passed in the hall. (TW)

(Hitler also demanded to be saluted whenever encountered.)                                                                

Breathe Deeply

A nurse came into my uncle's hospital room and asked him: "Do you use oxygen?"

My uncle looked quizzically and asked: "Doesn't everybody?" (RD)

Guess

Bill and Manny met at the cross roads and Manny was holding a big sack. Since it was almost Thanksgiving, Bill suspected, correctly, that Manny's sack contained turkeys.

Bill said, "If I guess correctly about the number of turkeys that are in your sack, will you let me have one?"

Manny said, "Sure!  And if you guess correctly, you can have both of them." (ST)

Seating Arrangement

I got sick the other day when my seat on the train faced backwards.

Why didn't you ask to switch seats with the person sitting across from you?

I couldn't, the seat was empty.  (AN)