Boston University; 9/11 Memorial Museum; Biometrics; DNA; SHYP; TASTEFUL; Language Training

Another rainy day, but the thermometer said 70 degrees!

Boston University Stuff

Over fifty (!) years ago, I graduated from Boston University.  The vast majority of the Vaughan family had no college experience.  However, my great-aunt, Julia, became a school teacher.  (I had her as a substitute when I was in the fifth grade.  She pretended not to know me and did not give me any special privilege.)  My uncle, Elliott, was in the first World War and went to college afterwards, putting himself through by running whatever was the equivalent of a 5 and 10 cent store back then.  Unfortunately, Elliott was killed at a young age by an overturned tractor.

After those two folks, college attendance was not something to be wished for until the kids in my age bracket (the "Vaughan Cousins") got the idea that higher education was the key to making a decent wage.  Since early in High School, I wanted to attend Boston University.  My job at the local YMCA didn't give me enough pay to save for tuition, and nobody in my family had that kind of money.  So, I magically joined the Air Force and this allowed me to use the G.I. Bill when I got out. I graduated in 1960.  I received a BA degree, and my wife, Elaine, received a PHT degree (Putting Hubby Through.)  She and I both worked full time to augment the G.I. Bill.  Her help allowed me to finish in three years.

I'm looking at a magazine I received today.  It's called Arts and Science. That is the name of the Boston University college that I attended.  In my time, it was called the College of Liberal Arts (CLA).  Lots of famous people graduated from that college, for instance:

Jan Seidler Ramirez: As the Chief Curator of the 9/11 Memorial Museum, she ensures that thousands of lives don't disappear from history.  One of the walls at the museum displays these words of Virgil: "No day shall erase you from the memory of time."

John Woodward: A 21-year veteran of the CIA and Defense Department who specialized in intelligence, counterterrorism and technology policy.  He is now a professor of the practice of international relations at the Pardee School for Global Studies.   John believes that we should concentrate on our biometrics to safeguard our security.

A National identity management bureau would use mug shots and fingerprints and issue identity cards for all citizens.  However, half of the U.S. citizens would probably not like this infringement on their privacy.

How about DNA? Right now, many police departments are gathering DNA from felons.  Just think, if everyone's fingerprints and DNA was in a database.. would OJ ever get out of jail?  .. would Vince Foster's murderer be found? 

Laszlo Beres:  Born in Hungary, he fled in 1956 during the Hungarian Revolution.  He arrived in the U.S. at the age of 12.  A smart kid, Boston University recognized it, and was generous to him with financial aid.  He obtained a BS degree and later a PhD in Chemistry.  An expert in his field for 26 years.

Dan Rummel:  The chief technology office or SHYP, a San Francisco-based company.  Using the SHYP APP, one takes a picture of what one wants to send, chooses the destination and how quickly you want it to get there, and then requests pickup. Supposedly, within 20 minutes, a SHYP courier is at your door, ready to take care of your shipping need.  This facility is available right now in only four cities: San Francisco, Los Angeles, New York and Chicago.  Tomorrow... the world?

Eswar Priyadarshan:  Creator of "Tasteful", an APP that he calls "Yelp for the healthy eater." One uses to find local restaurants that serve nutritious and tasty food that adheres to your dietary needs and preferences.

Language Program at Boston University

B.U. is part of a program giving future Army officers a solid grounding in critical languages, as needed by the Department of Defense.  The program is called GO (Global Officer) and is part of the ROTC program.  Students can learn such languages as Burmese, Hindi, Sudanese, Arabic, Japanese, Turkish, Korean, Hausa, and Wolof.  Graduates of the program can also get free online tutoring as needed.

This reminds me of my language training situation with Russian at B.U.  I thought that I was a hot-shot linguist when I started.  I took advanced German and French and Spoken Russian. I was able to get good grades in all courses; however, I had not taken enough Russian to continue in an advanced Russian grammar class and did not continue.  And now, if I have that very rare opportunity to speak Russian, I can't remember if I'm saying "Hello, and how are you?"  or "What is your name?" 

Once, I thought I would be smart and said "thank you" in Russian  to a  Russian born clerk at the Social Security cafeteria, and she started spouting Russian at me.  I was completely lost.  I should have shut up.  I'm lucky to be able to speak English at this stage of my life.

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Well, now I'm fired up about Boston University again... I wonder if I can afford to send them a donation?

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Sneaky Squirrel; Racial Identity; Archie Bunker; Justice; Shakespeare; Marlowe; Quotes; Mensa Humor

Rainy and cool.

Sneaky and his Brothers

Our friendly, always hungry squirrel came back to visit us today and brought two brothers.  One of them got soaked from the rain and looked like a sewer rat.  Tomorrow's sun should fix him up.

Alt-Right

Alt-Right equates to All-White.

Racial Identity?

Ken Wibecan and Virginia Hood wrote in the Internet bulletin about race:

"Fact:  Not one characteristic, trait, or gene distinguishes all members of one so-called race from all members of another so-called race."

"Race, like ethnicity and culture, is a social construct, and visible characteristics of race are unreliable indicators of genetic and ethnic variation.  Because people have been described in this way, however, and relegated to these categories (particularly in the USA), race has been and continues to be used, as if it has scientific validity, even by thinking individuals whose education and training should inform them otherwise."

Archie Bunker on Justice

"It's a proven fact that Capital Punishment is a known detergent for crime."

"I didn't insult the Defense Attorney.  I just told him what I thought of pinko, bleeding-heart lawyers who get sentimental over killers."

"It's an open and shut case.  Two witnesses see this Martinez coming home, one witness sees him go into his apartment, and the rest is simply induction.  He finds his old lady in there with another spic, whips out his switchblade --and Zap! --he sends him to the Big Taco Stand in the sky."

Wait a Minute!

Recently, the Oxford University Press said that Christopher Marlowe will be given official co-authorship  credit with Shakespeare.  At least, with the three historical dramas about Henry VI.

No... No... No... Please No!

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Some good quotes from Readers Digest:

Critiquing:

Billy Wilder:  "He has Van Gogh's ear for music."

Cats

Jeff Valdez: "Cats are smarter than dogs.  You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow."

Calvinism:

Stephen Hawking:  "I have noticed that even people who claim everything is predetermined and that we can do nothing to change it, look before they cross the road."

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Strange Info from Harper's Index

Female genital mutilation has occurred to 79% of Egyptian girls 15 to 17 years old.  However, in 2008, Egypt passed a law banning the procedure.

One fifth of lesbian, gay and bisexual Republicans oppose same-sex marriage.  (Now how the hell do they know that?) 

The number of U.S. measles cases has increased almost 12% since 2013.

Three U.S. politicians have distributed AR-15 assault rifles at campaign events this year..

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Some High-IQ Humor?

The Mensa Bulletin for September 2016 published some humorous questions  submitted by Simon Goldstein:

Q: What famous movie director started his career as a manufacturer of rope?

A:  Sisal B. DeMille

Q:  What piece of clothing are all female cemetery employees required to wear?

A:  A graveyard shift.

Q:  When Doctor Watson handed Sherlock Holmes a rock for identification, what did Sherlock say?

A:   Sedimentary, my dear Watson.

(OK, OK, don't get mad at me... yell at Simon!)

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Politics; Electors Revolt; Eating Disorder; Dieting; Joke; Pun

Cool but sunny.

Politics Again

A Texas elector is now saying that he will resign rather than cast a vote for Mr. Trump for President.  Also, there are hints of a rebellion by some electors.  Maybe this election is not yet over. 

I believe that some Pennsylvania college professor has indicated that it would have been easy to hack into the voting system and alter votes.  Hmmm?

Eating Disorder/Dieters' Hope?

The New York Times reports on a young lady who has a very rare bodily problem that requires her to eat something every fifteen minutes.  It also attacks the face of the person and makes a teen-ager look like a smoking 40 year old.  Doctors are studying the situation and they are hoping to somehow get some tip from her body on how to get obese people to lose weight. 

Welcome Aboard!

(A joke from Jack Hickey in the Saturday Evening Post:)

After the funeral, the bereaved husband chatted with the preacher outside the church.

"Remember, son, she's going to a better place," the preacher said, just before a clap of thunder rattled the church windows.

The husband looked toward the sky and said, "Guess she's arrived."


Get Ready!

A man goes to his dentist because he feels something is wrong in his mouth.  The dentist examines him and says, "That new upper plate I put in for you six months ago is eroding.  What have you been eating?"

The man replies, "All I can think of is that about four months ago my wife made some asparagus and put some stuff on it that was delicious.  Hollandaise sauce.  I loved it so much I now put it on everything, on meat, toast, fish, vegetables, everything."

"Well," says the dentist, "that's probably the problem.  Hollandaise sauce is made with lots of lemon juice, which is highly corrosive.  It's eaten away your upper plate. I'll make you a new plate, and this time I'll use chrome."

"Why chrome?" asks the patient.

To which the dentist replies, "It's simple.  Everyone knows that there's no plate like chrome for the Hollandaise!"

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I warned you.  I don't know who sent me that pun, but I really like it.

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Readers Digest; Icky Stuff; Earwax; Pimple Pus; Fingernail Dirt; Eye Crud; Mucus; Belly Button Lint; Blister Fluid

Sunny and cool.

Icky stuff!

The Readers Digest for December 2016 has a one page "eye opening" explanation of all that gooey, sticky, smelly and icky stuff that accumulates in our bodies.  In case you haven't read the article (by Kelsey Kloss), here is my understanding of the "Body Gunk" article:

Earwax

Now I know why my hearing aid doesn't work.  It's because my ear canal is clogged up with cerumen, also known as earwax.  Earwax is not wax... it is a mixture of sloughed off hair, dead skin cells, oil and sweat.  All of this "gunk" supposedly lubricates the ear canal and helps you hear. 

Unfortunately, this "gunk" periodically coalesces and clogs my ear canal and makes my hearing aid inoperable.  So, I travel to my ear doctor and she scoops out the "gunk" and sends me on my way.  With that procedure done, my hearing aid begins to work again... at least for a week or so.

Pimple Pus

(Kelsey calls pus puss, which could cause some confusion.. maybe to Mr. Trump. Also, it seems to me that cruel teenagers would often refer to another kid with zits as "Pimple Puss.")

Anyway, pus is what we squeeze out of zits.  Kelsey says it will contaminate surrounding pores when it "oozes out." (Sorry for that, but you'll have to yell at Kelsey, instead of me.)

Fingernail Dirt

Kelsey says that this "grime" is a combination of keratin (whatever that it), skin cells, hand-lotions and such, and, of course, good old fashioned "dirt."  And, you may not want to believe it, but there is probably contamination under your fingernails, placed there accidentally when using a toilet. (Ugh!)  Also, if you cook, you may have raw food residue there too.

Eye Crud

A lot of yucky stuff collects in the corners of your eyes.  You'll find it there when you wake up in the morning.  Kelsey says it consists of mucus, dead skin cells, oil and even dust.  At least, during the day, blinking gets rid of it.

Mucus

"...water, dead white blood cells, salts, and proteins..."  make up mucus (you know what it looks like). "Mucus protects you by trapping bacteria that enter the body."  I never thought of it that way. 

Belly Button Lint

Yes, researchers have discovered that some lint accumulates there, as well as dead skin, sweat, dust and even fat (how does fat accumulate there?)  If you are a cro magnum person, there is probably hair growing around your belly button.  Kelsey says: "Hair spirals around the belly button, directing debris inward."

(Speaking of debris... one summer, I worked shoveling out houses which had been buried in sand during a major New England hurricane.  The supervisor kept saying "Move that DEBRIZ!"
Of course, we smart-aleck college students "knew" what he should have said was "Move that DEBREE!"  However, some  years later I learned that lots of Brits say DEBRIZ.  So, as usual, we didn't know as much as we thought we knew.)

Blister Water

Clear fluid under a blister protects the irritated tissue during healing. Kelsey warns us to be concerned if the fluid is white or yellow rather than clear.  This could indicate an infection.

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Now, if you want to know more about this "gunk," get a copy of the Digest.. on page 122 is the original article, with some good internet references.

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Crossword Puzzles; Cryptics; Tasmanian Devil Milk; MRSA; Pareidolia; Zebras

Sunny, cool Fall day.

Crossword Puzzles

I tore about 50 crossword puzzles out of The Week magazines hoarded by Elaine.  I try to do at least 3 of them a day.  Only about 10 left.  It's amazing how much the "setters" use the same letters in different puzzles, but with different clues.  I can't imagine how hard it must be to create a new puzzle each day.  I have had a computer program that I could manipulate to produce crossword puzzles.  I made a few that were published in the Social Security Alumni Association Newsletter.  Even with a program it was tedious. So, I'll just stick with solving other people's.

Cryptics

I think I mentioned that I like to do British style crossword puzzles.. so-called Cryptics.

They are a little hard for Americans to figure out at first, so most people just give up on them.  However, if you keep at it, they get a bit easier.  Try it, you'll eventually like it.

Crosswords in other Languages

German: lots of different kinds, but much repetition of clues.

French: seems as though each puzzle is almost the same as each other.  Easy, if you have even a rudimentary mastery of French.  At least that is my opinion.

Italian:  fun, but you need a good background in the language.

Breakthrough?

The Week reports that Australian researchers have discovered that the milk produced by Tasmanian devils can be used to fight antibiotic resistant superbugs like MRSA.

By the way, a few years ago I was really upset to learn that I had the MRSA bug in my system. I was told that's there was nothing they could do to get rid of it for me.  Later, my daughter, Diane, spent a long time in the hospital and rehab and also was told that she had the MRSA bug.  So, apparently, if you have spent any time in the hospital, you may have been exposed to the bug.

The last time Elaine was in the hospital, her room was quarantined because of MRSA. 

So.. lets get out some very short three-legged stools and start to milk these devils!

Does that Potato look like Nixon?

I want to quote from an article in the Saturday Evening Post for November 2016:

"There are lots of studies that show that people's brains are primed to see faces and patterns in inanimate objects.  The phenomenon even has a name: pareidolia.  We've come to understand that this predisposition became hard-wired into human brains for survival.  A baby who recognizes a human face or a hunter who see patterns made by an animal in the grass is going to have an advantage over one who does not.  The same natural tendency to look for and see faces and patterns all around us also sometimes inspires people to see the Virgin Mary in a piece of toast or an old man's face on the side of a mountain."

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By the way, believe it or not, every Zebra has a different stripe pattern, but baby zebras never have any trouble finding their mamas within a zebra crowd.

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Thanksgiving Dinner Memories; SKYPE; Virtual Reality; Dick Tracy; Vocabulary Test Results

Nice Fall day. Since it was "Black Friday,"  I didn't venture out to shop for necessities., like beer and wine. 

Yesterday, Elaine and I had a great Thanksgiving meal at the beautiful home of my son and his lovely wife, Kathleen.  Most of my grandchildren were there, as well as my great grandchild.  It does my heart good to see how they are all now taller than me.  One grandson was worried that he was going to be a short guy, but he has sprouted up in a short period of time. He's still a little worried, because people have told him he looks like I did when I was his age.  Sorry.  He'll get over it. (But, of course, he is a very handsome boy!)  (This is where I am supposed to put an emoticon with a smiling face.)

Talking to a couple of my grandkids, I learned how to download 350 pictures from my cell phone and  found out about some apps that will be useful. Smart kids!  And handsome and beautiful too!

I like to remember back when I was kid at Thanksgiving day.  My grandmother spent a long time cooking a turkey, making cranberry sauce, mashing potatoes, creating the stuffing, cooking the vegetables and baking lots of pies.  I don't think she got any help from my grandfather or uncles. Some of my aunts helped out, but I doubt my mother did, even though she was a great cook.  She cooked meals every day for the folks she worked for so she needed a day off from that job.

Some folks did not show up for the Thanksgiving dinner and we didn't know why, because we were too poor to have a telephone.  What a difference yesterday.  Via SKYPE, we all were able to see and talk to my sister, her boy friend, and cousin in New Bedford, Massachusetts.  Amazing! This was something that I thought about for years and wondered if we would ever have.

Who knows what is next.  Our relatives right next to us via virtual reality?  Probably. All of the future objects that we drooled over when we read the Dick Tracy comic strip are here now.  What a time we live in.

Kurzweill predicts that in 2040 we will be able to upload our brain contents to whatever the "cloud" is then.  This will give us eternal life... well, at least until the sun lashes out and burns us up.

Meanwhile, I keep finding how dumb I am, for instance:

Readers Digest has a monthly test of  "Word Power" and during a recent test, I bombed out on 4 words that I thought I knew:

plangent:  very loud  (I thought it was flexible) This comes from the Latin verb: plangere, to strike or beat one's chest in grief, or to lament. 

chthonic:  of the underworld (I thought it was having sharp claws) This is from the Greek word for "earth."  Hades lives under the earth, where he rules, and he is called a chthonic diety.

.

gormless:  stupid (I thought it was lacking firm shape)  This began in Britain and is still used there much more than in the U.S. It started as:  gaum (attention) and less. 

pixilated:  mentally unbalanced (I thought it was elfin.) This is just a corruption of "pixie."  Is a leprechaun pixilated?

Shame on me for missing these words. I have seldom, if ever felt the need to use these words in my correspondence.   However, I will attempt to rectify that situation by slipping them into my blog entries from time to time.

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Whale Songs; Bible Phrases; Phoney News; Sauerkraut; Turkeys; Lum and Abner; Cheerfulness

Another cool Fall day.  But no wind.  That's good.

Old but Good Stuff

I had a crossword puzzle from The Week Magazine for May, 2011 that I had not completed.  I found it the other day and completed it.  On the same page were a couple of contests that interested me:

1.  This Week's Question:  Since it has been determined that whales sing tunes that can be heard  and mimicked by other whales for up to 4,000 miles, what could possibly be the #1 hit tune on the cetacean hit parade?

Elaine wrote: "I am so Blue."  I thought this was a great response and sent it in to be considered.  No luck.  I don't recall the winning entry.. but it obviously could not compare to Elaine's entry.

2. Last Week's Contest:  Translate a famous phrase from the Bible into current lingo. 

The Winner:  "My God, my God! Why have you unfriended me?"

Third Place:  "And on the seventh day, He chilled.

(Waiting for the lightning to strike.)

Phony News

NPR tracked down the guy who was responsible for creating phony news during the election campaign.  He is a Democrat who would have liked for Hillary to win.  So, why did he create garbage stories that the Republicans used to fire up their supporters?

He said that he did it to mess up the Alt Right people.  The false news story would go out and the Alt Right would grab onto it and make sure that it was widely distributed through their sites.  Then, supposedly, the story would be tagged as false and withdrawn, shaming the Alt Right folks. (I don't thing that it worked that way though.)

P.U.

Elaine and I are making sauerkraut for tomorrow's Thanksgiving dinner.  Us New Englanders never realized that some folks (namely, Germans in Maryland) liked to  have sauerkraut with their turkey. Elaine's recipe calls for lots of turkey meat, apples, and unions blended with the kraut and cooked in a crock pot for a long time.  I never liked sauerkraut, but I do like Elaine's.  And the smell of it cooking is really not that bad.  One gets used to it quickly.  But it does kind of smell like someone has run over a skunk nearby.

You Turkey!

NPR reports that the Pilgrims brought some turkeys to the New World and they mated with native birds to create a delicious tasting turkey called a Narragansett Turkey (New England area name).  However, after a while these turkeys dwindled until there were only ten of them some years ago. Far seeing farmers worked on restoring them and now there are supposedly thousands on farms near and far.  One farmer reported selling out with hundreds of them this week... the going price was $6 or $7 a pound, but the flavor is reported to be much better than other type turkeys.


Lum and Abner

I hope that you have been able to listen to a rebroadcast of the Lum and Abner radio show from November 1942.  The "boys" just can't chop poor "handsome Clarence's" head off and cook him for dinner.  Instead, they call up the local café and arrange a cooked one to be delivered.  It's a very funny and thought-provoking session.  It gets played every year on WAMU-FM's Old Time Radio Show (Sunday Nights at 7:00 pm at 88.5). 

Cheerfulness

I'm almost done with listening to the Great Course on Emotions. I've mentioned before that the professor does not believe that emotions are spontaneous.  He believes that they are deliberately thought out before coming to the fore.  This may take only milliseconds and directly relates to how we were brought up and what our culture expects.

The final emotion that he is covering is cheerfulness.  He agrees with Europeans that Americans are too cheerful.  That we seem like idiots, grinning all the time while life is not that pleasant.

Well.. I disagree. Americans live in a place where there is freedom to become whatever we want to be, if we have the talent and "push" to motivate ourselves to find opportunities, and that can contribute to cheerfulness, in my opinion. (If it is so bad to be cheerful, why do those dour Europeans change to cheerful Americans in a short period of time, living in the United States?)

Living where we live, everybody who has lived here any length of time will say "Hi!", wave, or pass the time with others they meet on the campus.  You can tell the new folks; they will try to avoid eye contact for a while until they relax.  Cheerfulness probably contributes to the lifestyle that has resulted in the large number of 100 year old people who live here.

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Adieu, mon Ami!

Gale Winds; Birthday Party; Some Grandma Jokes; Sex Education; Age; More Wind; The Story; Thai Food; Chocolates

Gale winds continue to blow.  Three days now, and cold.  This is like living in the "Little House on the Prairie."  Sooner or later, everything will equalize and we can go outside without being blown away.

We had Elaine's 70th birthday party yesterday.  Everyone said they had a good time.  The food was good (even some for people to take home) and the music was just right.  Elaine let me do a little emceeing, but I couldn't do too many jokes because she wanted it to be a kind of serious occasion.  It's not everyday that you have a 70th birthday.

Here are the jokes I told, in case  you weren't there:

What does a Woman want in a Man?

At age 60:

He doesn't scare children.
He remembers where the bathroom is.
He only snores softly.
He is able to stand up by himself.
He likes soft food.
He remembers where he left his teeth.

But, at age 70:

He is breathing.
He usually doesn't miss the toilet.

How Old are You?

When her grandson asked Elaine how old she was, she teasingly replied: "I'm not sure."

"Look in your underwear, Grandma" he advised, "mine says I'm 4 to 6."

Sex Education?

Grandma's granddaughter who was in second grade, told her grandma: "Grandma, guess what? Last week we learned how to make babies."

Grandma, a little shocked, recovered enough to ask: "That's interesting, how do you make babies?"

"It's simple, Grandma.  You just change the 'y' to 'i' and add 'es'."

Shame on You!

Two kids talking and one says: "My grandparents are funny.  When they bend over you hear gas leaks and then they blame their dog."

Acute Observation

Her grandson asked grandma:  "Grandma, do you know how you and God are alike?"

Feeling proud, Grandma asked: "No, how are we alike?"

"You're both old," he replied.

The Story

Her granddaughter, when very young, was diligently pounding away on Grandma's word processor.  She said that she was writing a story.

"What's it about? asked Grandma.

"I don't know," she replied. "I can't read yet."

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I had a lot more ready.. but this was enough.

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Today, we got up early and went on a trip to the Columbia Mall.  This was a trip on a Carroll Lutheran Village bus and not many folks went.  We spent a lot of time at the mall eating Thai food. Excellent!  They snagged us right away by offering lots of free samples.

The only other thing we did of any importance was to buy a box of Wochenfuss chocolates.  Elaine picked out twenty delicious delicacies.  Eating those, plus the chocolate favors that we had left over from the birthday party means that our blood sugar levels will be sky-high.  But, what the hell, we don't overindulge that often.

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Incidentally, another 8 Christmas catalogs appeared in our mailbox today!

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Junk Mail; Catalogs; Justice Scalia; Justice Thomas; "grandma"; the Peach emoji

This may be our last warm and sunny  day this year, so I will be treating Elaine to a pleasant trip to Frederick and to a belly-busting meal at the famous country restaurant there.. which has a name that I can't remember ... due to my advanced age, of course.  It should be fun.  Elaine's birthday was yesterday and tomorrow we will be having a party for her.

Junk Mail

Everybody knows that I like junk mail, apparently even those folks that publish catalogs.  For instance, here are the titles of most of those catalogs that we found stuffed in our mailbox for the last three days:

Appleseeds
Better Homes
Blair (2)
Bradford Exchange
Brecks
Creations
Critics Choice
Creative Irish Gifts
Daedalus Books (3)
Das Bleu
Dream Products
Fresh Finds (2)
Gardeners
Gregory's
Hammacher Schlemmer
Harriet Carter
Heartland
Lehman's
L.L. Bean (2)
Meduri
Mindware
Monticello
National
Norm Thompson
Old Pueblo Traders
PBS
Pinetree
Russell's
Scientifics
Sharper Image
Smithsonian (2)
Tog Shop
Toscano
Vermont Country Store
Victorian Trading
World Wide Gifts
Wolferman's
Woman Within

That's 44 (count'em) fat Christmas season catalogs.  Of course, they will all go into the recycle bin.. but not before Elaine scans them all looking for bargains.  (We may have to get a bigger mailbox.)

Antonin Scalia

I listened to some speeches on CSPAN from a national lawyers meeting this week.  A lot of the talk was about the "untimely" passing of Supreme Court Justice, Antonin Scalia.  One of the speeches was by his fellow justice and pal, Clarence Thomas.  I had never heard Judge Thomas speak before, so I was anxious to see what he would say.  He and Judge Scalia shared the same Conservative approach to the Constitution, but Scalia talked a lot during hearings, while Thomas rarely, if ever, even asked a question during any proceeding.

Justice Thomas gave a nice speech; however, most of what he said was a reiteration of famous quotes of Justice Scalia, for instance:

"No one should see how laws and sausages are made."

"The operation was a success, but the patient died."

I'm anxious to see who Donald Trump puts forward as a Scalia replacement.  Ivanka?  Kushner?

Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me

This week's show was nice.  Garth Brooks was quizzed and Paula Poundstone agitated, as usual.

The only thing that remains with me is the results of a study that showed that any product with the name "grandma" associated with it sells better than other like products.

They did talk about the "peach" emoji, which has been redrawn to make it look more like an actual peach, rather than Kim Kardashian's butt.

Voting; Electoral College; Bureaucracy; Criminal Activity; Parking; Messy Desks;

Another 70 degree Fall day.  Global  warming? Climate change?  Which/what is it?

Politics Again

According to Harper's Index in the recent Funny Times:

Only 9% of Americans cast a ballot for either Hillary Clinton or Donald Trump in the 2016 primary elections.

The index also says that 20 states do not require Electoral College members to vote for the candidate who won their state.  (What would happen if some electors decide to vote their conscience instead?)

As I read somewhere (Facebook?) an Elector can vote for someone other than the person who won the state and suffer a small fine.  (Is this true?)

Bureaucracy in Action, but with a Nice Result

Chuck Shepherd (also in the Funny Times) reports that Wanda Witter had been living on the DC streets for 10 years, telling anyone who would listen, that the Government owed her $100,000. This 80 year old lady said that she had proof.

Finally, a  heroine appeared.  Social worker, Julie Turner, took an interest and found that Witter was indeed owed $100,000 and maybe more.  Wanda received a first check for $999, and another for $99,999 shortly thereafter.

Another Major Criminal Apprehended

Chuck Shepherd also reported that a woman was arrested in the Italian Pizza Kitchen by a police officer with whom she was chatting.  She playfully took and ate some items from the cop's plate and so he had to run her in.  "The arrest report for second degree theft, cited by (DC) WUSA-TV, included 'property stolen' as 'three French-fried potatoes.'"

Sounds like another "Barney Fife" Moment

A friend of mine visited  formerly "flood ravaged" Ellicott City, Maryland recently.  Because they still have a parking problem, he had to park his car outside of the main drag, but in a handicap reserved spot.  He hung his disability parking tag on his rear view mirror, as required.  He then walked the mile to the shops that are now open again.

When he returned, he found a $45 parking ticket on his windshield.  The ticket indicated the problem was "failure to display an authorized tag in a restricted parking spot."   Seeing varied shades of red, my friend drove right up to the Ellicott City Police Station and took his parking tag in for them to see.   The Station Cop tore the ticket up and said that they had been having trouble with a new policeman, who saw violations everywhere he looked.  In this case, he could not read the number emblazoned on the parking tag clearly through the windshield and therefore decided that it was a phony. 

Messy Desks

For half of my term working at the Social Security Administration, I kept the messiest desk imaginable.  But... I was always able to find something when I needed it.   I felt like W. C. Fields when he was cast as a memory expert in old time movies.  His roll top desk was filled with papers of all kinds, all jumbled together.  However, whenever his boss asked him for information about a customer, he could just reach right into the pile of paper and find what was needed.  At night, he would just drop the roll top down and all the messiness was neatly contained.

A problem arose when he took leave for a day and a new office assistant decided to help him out by opening his desk and neatly stacking like papers.  When W.C. came to work the next day, he opened his desk and was startled to see neatness accosting his eyeballs.  But, ever resourceful and quite strong for a boozing middle aged curmudgeon, he merely closed the desk again, picked it up bodily and shook it for a minute so that everything could get nicely mixed again.

Satisfied with himself, he sat there until his boss needed some more information.  At that request, he just opened the desk again, reached into the jumbled mess and produced the required document.

A classic routine... you have to see it to appreciate it.

Even though I enjoyed being messy, I decided to do the "clear desk" thing, and because I was a manager, I could get some special bookcases and tables for my office.  This furniture allowed me to keep a completely clear desk for the rest of my working life.

I do like what Raymond Lesser wrote recently (also in the Funny Paper) about messy desks:

"... my desk is a mess.  But I can still find what I need when I need it.  It'll be exactly where I last left it.  Occasionally I will dig in the bottom of some of my piles, kind of like an archeologist doing an excavation of an ancient civilization.  The civilization of the old me.  Usually I'll find some long lost project, the reason for which I can only guess at, that doesn't mean anything to me any more.  Into the recycling bin it will go, to make room for something more exciting on the top of the pile."

Quotations

For President Trump: 

Oscar Wilde: "To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance."

Tony Bill:  "We're surrounded by crazy people."  (Perhaps related to the new White House staff.?)

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Finally... I have relied on the Funny Paper for a lot of this blog entry.  I love that sheet. If you want, I'll treat you to a subscription.

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Headlines; Toilet Stuff; Hot Pants; Senior Joke; How Long to Keep Kitchen Stuff; Negative Buttoneering

It's getting cooler.. more like Autumn is supposed to be.  However, on Friday next it is supposed to be 70+ degrees again... is that Indian Summer?

Here is some things that I learned from Wait, Wait Don't Tell Me last Saturday:

Political Headline in some Newspaper

Trump Beats Woman

Headline in Littlestown, Connecticut: 

Toilet Paper to Fill Cracks

Yes, the Littlestown City Council has made a deal with a company that will fill cracks in the asphalt roads with toilet paper.  Apparently it makes a good binder.

Of course, they will have to bypass the skid marks.

New Creation for the Moneyed Class

Someone has developed mulled wine scented toilet paper.

Liar, Liar, pants on Fire

According to the New York Times, while Steve Bannon was putting Trump speech notes into a copy machine, he backed into a hot light fixture and set his pants on fire.  (Serves his ass right!)


Senior Joke

Two senior shoppers parked at the mall, got out of their car, and realized the had locked it with the keys inside.
"We'll have to break a window to get them out," said one to the other.
"No," the other replied.  "Maybe we can get a wire hanger and use it to unlock the door."
"That never works."
"Well, we'd better think of something.  It's starting to rain, and the top is down!"

More Household Tips

How long should I keep it?  Well, here is the answer.

Ketchup: 4 to 6 months in the refrigerator.

Jelly:  1 year in the refrigerator.

Mustard:  6 to 8 months in the refrigerator.

(I've had some there for years.!)

Peanut butter: 2 to 3 months

Mayonnaise:  2 months in the refrigerator

Vegetable oil: 3 months in the pantry.   6 months in the refrigerator

Olive oil:  12 to 18 months.

Vinegar: 6 months.

Negative Buttoneering

The Hightower Lowdown reports mentions a negative button that was prevalent during the recent presidential campaign:  TRUMP ES UN PENDEJO.

"Pendejo" is a noun widely used in Mexican-American communities as a laughing put-down of someone who is full of themselves.. this could be a snotty-nosed kid or a pretentious, silly person, or a contemptible jerk.

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Coping with a Trump Win: Archie Bunker; Beyonce; Mah-jongg Criminals; Nuturitional Code: Calories; Fat; Sodium; Vitamins; Minerals; Organics

Nice cool Fall day.

Some Thoughts about Trump's Win

Just think, if Clinton had won, there would not be the "tame" protests we are experiencing.  Instead, there probably would be armed vigilantes roaming our streets, shooting at anyone they thought was not 100% American.

But don't worry.. the fun we had, waking up each day to experience those Trump schadenfreude moments during the campaign, will probably continue.  A tiger does not lose his spots, and President Trump will probably keep us entertained for four years... or, at least until he gets censured or impeached.  I, for one, hope that he is successful in his governing, but I admit I am a little skeptical.

The stock market has zoomed since the election and I must admit that I am richer today than before the election.

We can now recycle this famous bumper sticker:  "Don't blame me, I didn't vote for him."

Cartoonists are in ecstasy over Trump's win.  Especially Mr. Troudeau.

The election gives hope to the people whose patron saint is Archie of Bunker, who foresaw this election almost 50  years ago.

Archie said:  "Just raisin' the flag to let everyone know -- including the foreigners -- that this house sits on American soil."

Archie said: "I never said aa man that wears glasses is a queer. A man that wears glasses is a four eyes.  A man that's a fag is a queer!"

Archie said:  'Look, Archie Bunker ain't  no bigot! I'm the first to say -- it ain't your fault you're colored."

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Life Goes On

Diva Demands

The Week magazine reports that while on her world tour, Beyoncé demanded that her dressing room be supplied with hand-carved ice balls, water chilled to exactly 60.8 degrees, and $1,000 titanium straws. 

This reminds me of the time when I was putting on a major computer management conference in the Baltimore Convention Center.  I was not allowed to overspend my budget, but the head of Health and Human Services (a political appointee) asked for and obtained a massively expensive conference room whose only purpose was to give her some space to put on her makeup.

Major Criminals

The Week magazine also reports that Tampa police raided and shut down a $4 a round mah-jongg game played by women between the ages of 87 and 95. These miscreants were appropriately arrested and fined for their heinous crime.

Nutritional Codes

UCLA Health newsletter lets us know what certain nutritional phrases mean:

Calories

Calorie-free: Fewer than 5 calories per serving.

Low-calorie: 40 calories or fewer per serving.

Reduced calorie: 25% fewer calories compared with the original item and its serving size.

Light or Lite:  33 fewer calories compared with the original and its serving size. .

Fat

Reduced fat: 25% less fat per serving compared with the original.

(Watchit!  Less fat often means more sugar to make the product palatable.)

Low-fat: Three grams of fat or less per serving.

Fat-free: Less than 0.5 grams of fat per serving.

Trans-fat-free: Less than 0.5 grams of trans-fat per serving.  Trans fat will soon be removed from food products, but until then the less, the better.

Sodium

Reduced sodium:  25% less sodium than in the original product.

Salt/sodium free:  Less than 5 mg of sodium per serving.

Very low sodium: 35 mg or less per serving

Low sodium:  140 mg or less per serving

Light in sodium (or lightly salted):  At least 50 % less sodium than the regular product.

No-salt-added or unsalted:  No salt is added; however this does not mean the food is sodium free.

Vitamins and Minerals

Excellent source of:  20% or higher of the daily value of the vitamin or mineral per serving.

Good source of:  10 to 19% of the daily value of the vitamin or mineral per serving.

Enriched with: The vitamin or mineral was removed during processing and then added back into the food.

Fortified with:  The vitamin or mineral is not naturally in the food, so it is added.

Other Label Codes

100% organic: Products have been inspected to ensure their organic practices.

Organic: At least 95% of the ingredients are organic.

Made with organic ingredients:  At least 70% of ingredients are organic.

Use-by/Sell-by/Best-by:  Dates by which the product should be eaten due to quality.  Use your judgement; When in doubt, throw it out.\


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Roast for Elizabeth at her Retirement

Veterans Day.

Last night, Elaine and I were happy to attend the Retirement  Party given by my daughter Elizabeth's fellow workers at the school where she "served" for many years.  It was a very nice affair, with lots of food contributed by the attendees (we brought banana bread.)  Video and skits galore took place and it was obvious that Elizabeth was a most beloved friend to everyone.  She, of course, had her lovable "quirks,"  which her "roasters" capitalized on. 

Years ago, when I retired from Social Security, Elizabeth joined my "roasters."  She made an acrostic of the letters of my name and said something true/funny/nice about every letter.  It was a wonderful gift to me.  So, I wanted, in a small way, to give her such a gift, and to let you know a little bit about her life before she knew you,  so I made an acrostic for her, as follows:

G is for Gypsy:

While I was in Germany, and while we were not yet engaged, my future wife and her mother noticed while coming out of church, that a group of gypsies had taken over a store front across the street. They had put out a sign: Fortunes Told.

My future wife and her mother decided to have their fortunes told.  The Gypsy seemed very excited to tell my future mother in law: "Maybe 7 or 8 years from now, I see you traveling to Baltimore, Maryland to visit your new granddaughter."

I can hear my future mother in law now saying: "Yeah, and that's when pigs will fly."

Neither my future mother in law nor my future bride had ever thought much about Baltimore.  They knew that it was somewhere down south.. probably below the Mason Dixon line.  So they had a good laugh about the prediction.

B is for Birth

The Gypsy's prediction started to come true.  We got married, I accepted a job in Baltimore, we moved there and after a while, we were blessed with a baby girl, that we named with the most beautiful name we could think of:  Elizabeth.

The birth time was interesting.  At that time, husbands were considered a nuisance and in the way at birthing time, so I spent 8 nervous, pacing hours outside of the hospital waiting for our little girl to be born.

N is for Night

Elizabeth was a good baby, but she had her days and nights mixed up.  So, when we wanted to sleep, she wanted to play.  When she wanted to play, or eat, or poop, or cry.. we wanted to sleep.  But we got used to it.

V is for Visit

The Gypsy's prediction came completely true!  Immediately after Elizabeth was able to be brought home to our Baltimore row home, my mother in law and father in law arrived at our house to welcome her into the family.

S is for Savior

While visiting us, my father in law, who was a chain smoker, fell asleep in one of our over-stuffed chairs and dropped his lit cigarette between the seat cushion and the chair arm, where it smoldered for a while and eventually caught fire.

We had all gone to bed and were asleep, except for Elizabeth, who smelled the smoke and woke us all up with her crying.  We immediately carried the now blazing chair out the front door and into the street where it eventually disintegrated.  Our little week-old baby had saved us adults from a fiery demise.

R is for Running

At the age of 6 or 7 months, Elizabeth got tired of sitting and laying around; she didn't like the idea of crawling, so she suddenly just stood up and began to run.  She has been running ever since.

L is for Lying

At one point in elementary school, I got a notice to come in to talk about Elizabeth's deportment.  One of her teachers said that she did not know how to handle this "hyper active" kid.  She even indicated to me that Elizabeth might be retarded.  This rubbed me the wrong way, so I decided to make this teacher rethink her relationship with my daughter.  So I lied.

I told her that there must be some mistake because I had Elizabeth evaluated at Hopkins and they found he IQ one of the highest ever recorded for someone her age.  This lie was completely accepted by the teacher.  Suddenly, Elizabeth was a child to be nurtured and helped to find activity that would be appropriate to her intelligence.  She must have passed the word on to the other teachers because from then on, as far as I knew, she was treated just like the other kids.

Some years ago, I was invited by the Eldersburg PTA to give a talk on "How to Raise Children."  Since it was at a PTA, I assumed that most of the people would be parents.  Nope.  Most were teachers, who did not like my story about the "lie."  In fact, some are still mad at me about it.  But I did what I thought was best by my lie.  I knew that Elizabeth had some form of attention deficit, but her mother and I did not want to deaden her system by allowing her to take medication.

I am really happy that we decided against medication... just look at all she has achieved so far in life.  Sure, she "burns the candle at both ends"... but look at the wonderful light it gives off.

M is for Moving

When Elizabeth and her sister, Diane, were teenagers, we moved to Gamber, Maryland, a very rural community.  On the day that we moved in, the doorbell rang and on the doorsteps we discovered a large group of local farm boys who came to see the "beauties" who had moved in.  One of them was even on a horse.  I had to handle lots of "friendly boys" over the years.  Even some who came "calling" in the middle of the night.

H is for Horse's Head

Finally, I want to mention that Elizabeth has always had a love for people and things that are "different".. For instance, one day, at her High School, she noticed a papier mache prop that was used for some Greek or Shakespearean play.  It was going to be thrown away.  Elizabeth asked to have it and brought it home.  It was a giant horses head.  In fact, it was so big that the bus driver refused to let her bring it on the bus.  So, she somehow managed to carry it for the twelve mile trip to Gamber.

Her mother took one look at the horse's head and refused to let it be in the house.  I, of course, loved it and placed it in a spot of honor in the basement.  There it stood, for all to admire, until it rotted.

There, I hope I have given you a little insight into the life of your friend before you met her.  The acrostic I made just could not adhere to Elizabeth's name, so instead, it shows:

GBNVSRLMH -  which, in Klingon, means:  WONDERFUL DAUGHTER!

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Trump: Hypocrites; New Bedford News; Blue Cross NARFE Award

Rainy Fall day, but not too cool.

I woke up this morning to the news that Mr. Trump was now the President.  After the feeling that I had been sucker punched in the stomach, I calmed down and got myself resigned to it.  Although I can't imagine how a person like that could become President, I will accept America's choice.

Can Trump govern?  Time will tell.  I don't want to keep hitting on him, but this morning I read a book review in The Week magazine that I thought I should mention...  and then move on.

The book is: Hitler: Ascent, 1889-1939, by Wolker Ullrich. The review is by Michiko Kakutani in the New York Times, and I quote: "Economic anxiety was high, government was polarized and gridlocked, and elites were being subjected to rising resentment.  Into this void stepped a man who in 1930 was dismissed, by a major magazine's editor, as 'a big mouth' and 'pathetic dunderhead.'   But Hitler knew how to play a crowd, fanning fear and anger, then offering himself as the strongman needed to shake things up.  As he's depicted in Ullrich's incisive portrait, he 'virtually wrote the book on demagoguery.'"

Sound familiar?  God help us!

Hypocritical Example

A fundamentalist couple recently gave their advice to a South Carolina waitress.  She is single and has no children, yet the couple wrote:  "woman's place is in the home" and "help make America great again " by cooking and cleaning as "your husband and God intended."

(I thought the slaves were emancipated.)

News From New Bedford

I just got off the phone with my cousin, Allen Vaughan.  He and his wife, Diana, are retired from New Bedford's (Vocational) High School.  From the time he was 12 years old, Allen was interested in automobiles and became an expert in several aspects of automotive engineering.  He told me that when he was 15 years old, he and his buddy borrowed his buddy's father giant '50's car and drove it to church (and also for a 100 mile jaunt.)  Yes, he did get punished.

Because of his automotive expertise, he was hired by the High School and while employed, completed his college work to pass Massachusetts' strict teachers requirements.  He also talked my Brother Leon in applying for a job at the same High School.  Leon also completed his college work while employed.  Very well motivated guys in my estimation.

Although New Bedford remains the main scallop fishing port in the world, as well as the greatest overall fishing port in the world, fish are getting harder and harder to catch because of the numerous restrictions placed on fishermen. For instance, recently, a large Atlantic area was placed "off limits" to allow fish species to avoid extinction.  Allen predicts that fishing will diminish but  scalloping will continue.  We'll see.

Blowing my own Horn

Last month, the Blue Cross representative presented me with an award for "many years of service to the retired Federal employees organization (NARFE) and also for service to several other senior citizen organizations."  Here is proof.

I'm the old short guy in the middle.

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Birthday for Elaine; Mr. Trump: Vasectomy; Theism; A Pun; Exercise Stats; Election Night

Another beautiful Fall day... 65 degrees and sunny mostly.

Elaine went to a birthday party for those who were born in November.  They had nice finger sweets, but NOBODY SANG "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"  Hey, what kind of party is that.

I started the arrangements for another Birthday party for Elaine.  November 20th at 4 pm at a nice location in the "village" where we live.  This is a BIG birthday for Elaine, and she does not like being as old as the calendar says.  I think she looks a  lot younger than her years.

We just got back from getting our carry-out supper at our Bistro.  They have set up a big-screen TV for results watching.  And.. somewhere, they found life-size cut-outs of Donald and Hillary.  It is really eerie because their eyes follow you wherever you go. 

So..  tonight is that time that we have all been waiting for and dreading.  I do not know what will happen if Trump is elected.  Recently, Angela Merkel visited Nigeria, and asked the President where his wife was... he said something to the effect that she was home in the kitchen where women belong.  Angela was not happy with that reply.  Just think what Trump would have said.

I hope that his current wife did not sign an agreement not to disclose Trump's husbandly activity when they divorce.  I can just imagine what kind of husband/father he is.  BTW someone reported that he got mad once  at one of his sons who was in college, and punched him out.  I don't know if that was true or not, but I wouldn't be surprised at anything Trump did or does.

How about this Family Man?

The Week magazine reported that a Virginia man who has fathered seven children with six different women agreed last week to have a vasectomy as part of a plea deal.  This paragon of virtue was charged with child endangerment, driving on a suspended license, and hit and run.  The judge offered to reduce his sentence by up to five years if he agreed to undergo a vasectomy.  He did, and he got away with only 20 months in jail.

How about some Religious Thought?

Extract of a letter to the Mensa Bulletin:  "Theists believe, with no possibility of proof, that God exists.  Actually, this belief in itself is entirely harmless; the problems arise when people start to assume that they know, or can know, God's will.  This second assumption can be refuted by logical argument from the basic premise of God's existence .. refuted within a theistic framework, in other words.. but the existence of God cannot be logically disproven.  It is therefore a belief."

What do you think?

From  (or) To, My Brother Joe, the Word Expert

A man entered a local paper's pun contest, He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.  Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

Exercise Stats

The Week reports a global study has found that the U.S. is ranked among the most physically lazy countries in the world, with 40% of Americans engaging in little or no physical activity.  Greece was found to be the most active country in the Western world, with just 15% inactive.

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Enough.. I have to go and see how the election is going.

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