Christmas Stuff
On Christmas Eve, Elaine and I treated her family to supper at our Bistro, after which we exchanged gifts. The kids seemed to be happy with their gifts. They couldn't wait to get home and leave some carrots for Santa's reindeer. These two kids are half Christian and half Jewish, and they celebrate both cultures, and this year Hanukah begins on the same day as Christmas.
On Christmas day, my daughter, Diane and her husband John, hosted family Christmas at their house (which used to be my house). A great time was had by all. Unfortunately, Elaine had a migraine type headache and couldn't attend. She did send cookies and sauerkraut... you know, Baltimore people love sauerkraut at occasions like Thanksgiving and Christmas... and the kraut went fast. Even I had some... it was very tasty, not vinegar like.
Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me
The Christmas edition of this show gave me thoughts to think about, such as this Daffy Dozen:
01. Women make better doctors, nurses, and healthcare providers. (Yes, Elaine has said that for years, however, I don't think I would enjoy a prostate exam given by a female. Guess I'm old fashioned like that.
02. New Item for the Holidays. Raindeer Boobs. (You can look that one up. Check out Rudolph's bright red nose.))
03. New Item for the Holidays. Jingle Balls. (I'm not going there.)
04. New Item for the Holidays in the Trump Environment. Nuclear Survivor Barbie.
05. One of the airlines has begun to have a separated place for people who die during long flights. (Apparently, now, if you "kick off" while in flight, the attendants just prop you up in an empty seat for the duration of the flight. This might not be that pleasant for a seat mate.)
06. Innovative Direction Signs. (In Sherpa country, if you die while climbing a high mountain, sometimes it's impossible to carry you to the flat areas, so, instead, they prop you up and use you as a direction sign. ) Remember, when husbands die during a long Alaskan cold spell, their spouses bury them out back in the snow. Why? Well, because that is "proof of death" for the Social Security Field Reps, who may not make it to the house to take a death claim for some time. .
07. New Drink by Starbucks: Fruitcake frappocino. (Why does everybody hate fruitcake? I really like it, but Elaine does not... so at Christmas time, instead of fruitcake, we eat German Stollen. )
08. IKEA Slumber Parties. (In some European countries, young people are hiding in closets until the stores close, when they pop out and have their version of Slumber Parties. Clever kids.)
09. Finger Condoms. Kentucky Fried Chicken (KFC) has come out with roll-on finger protectors for when you eat their greasy fried chicken.
10. The Butterball Hotline. (Everyone laughed when this was mentioned. I did not get it. Does it have something to do with KFC....well, maybe I get it.)
11. Garlic Breakthrough. A study has now determined that one can taste garlic with your feet. They say that it takes one hour, but within that time, the taste travels from your feet to your brain. (Now, why the hell would I want to know that?)
12. Car Window Breakthrough. Some people noticed that a slumped over older woman in a locked car was not responding to their knocks on the car window, so they called 911. The responders broke the window and opened the door and prepared to revive the poor lady.... who turned out to be a CPR dummy.
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