BEER!

"Beer, beer, that wonderful drink,

The more you guzzle, the more you think."

You will probably disagree with that, and I do too (some times), but set before me a mountain of spicy  steamed crabs and a pitcher of IPA, and I become as smart as Einstein.

Some people do not believe this, but I'm sure it's true.  The reason the Pilgrims landed at Plymouth was because they needed good water for brewing their beer.

In her "Drinking in America,"  Susan Cheever wrote, "Beer was more potable than water in seventeenth century Europe, and when the Mayflower (beer) supplies were running low, its captain made an impromptu landing at Cape Cod."

The water on the Cape wasn't very good, so the pilgrims sailed across Cape Cod Bay and landed at what is now Plymouth.  The water there made tasty beer, so they decided to stay.

Over the years I have migrated from a six pack per meal guzzler to a more civilized one beer a day conservative drinker.  And, of course, now my beer-belly is more manageable.

Here are some beer-related remembrances and observations:

When I first tasted beer as a pre-teen, I gagged and  vowed to never drink such a nasty brew.

Waiting in New York City for a plane ride home from boot camp, my buddies and I realized that in New York you could drink beer at age 18.  

To vote for Miss Rhinegold, you had to have a beer.  I suddenly realized I had a taste for Rheingold beer and voted a few times.  I had become a beer junkie.

While attending Boston University, I drove a cab part-time in my hometown, New Bedford, Massachusetts.  One of my customers worked at the famous Dawsons Brewery in that town.

The brewery had a sink where workers could clean up. Next to the sink was a rusty pipe and faucet, from which delicious beer could gush in case you were thirsty.  I visited that sink a few times while waiting for my fare to get off work.

In Baltimore I discovered IPA (India Pale Ale) a remarkable potion.  

The Tell Tale Heart IPA honors Edgar Allen Poe's story, and is delicious. (IMHO)

The Truth IPA is also tasty.

In 2010, Michigan would not give a brewing license for Raging Bitch IPA, because they felt it demeaned women.  I've had it as part of the Snake Dog IPA series of craft beers.  I like it, regardless of the name.

There are a few beer-related things that bug me.

Loewenbraeu (Lowenbrau) beer was a marvelous German beer. I couldn't get enough of it, in fact I kept a case under my office desk in Germany.  Only heathens drink cold beer in Germany, at least then.

I was happy to learn that my favorite beer could now be bought in the U.S. I tried it. Blaa!  It had become a watery no flavor American beer.  So I gave up on it.

I made pretty good beer at my Gamber home but gave it up when the delicious IPA's appeared on the scene. I couldn't compete. 

There is one beer thing that boils my blood.  In movies, whenever anyone has a beer, they drink it from the bottle.  How uncivilized... and you can't even get the taste that way. I've been to restaurants that appeared to be high-class, but whose waiters hand you your beer in the bottle.  I always make them give me a glass, and I hope you do too.

Let's finish with a beer joke.

A man comes to Mrs. Smith's door and says, "There's been an accident at the brewery.  Your husband fell into a vat of beer and drowned."

Mrs. Smith wails, "Oh, the poor man! He never had a chance!"

The man said, "I don't know about that.  He got out three times to go pee."

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