Hot Stuff

How-to Instructions

Take a 4' x 4' piece of canvas, stretch it over a wooden frame, tack the canvas to the wood of the frame.

Take a gallon of bright orange enamel paint and spill it all over the canvas.  Make sure it doesn't show bumps.

Let it dry overnight.

Congratulations!  You have just duplicated a "painting" by Barnett Newman, abstract impressionist. 

Now find a sucker who is willing to pay thousands of dollars for this stupid attempt at artwork.

Nice work if you can wrangle it.

Telephone Scams

A few months ago I activated a "call blocker" on our landline.  It has worked very well, blocking those telephone scammers whose caller ID says "unknown."

However, I still suffer about twenty calls a day, where the caller does not respond to my "Hello." Does my voice scare them away?

Once in a while. a caller might answer. When I ask what they want, the say they want to talk to Joe Vagnag or Elaine Lotus.  I think that their accents pinpoint them to Asia, I could be wrong.  I hang up.

If they get the names right, they attempt to get me into polite conversation.  This is the latest scammer ploy.  Gain the mark's confidence and then hit them up for money or bank account numbers.

One method also used is to call randomly and tell the answerer that they must have dialed wrong.  They will apologize and then casually ask about the weather or items in the news.  Later, after gaining the answerer's trust, they will bug these same people for money.

More Garden Stuff

My beautiful daughter, Diane visited this afternoon. She complimented me for growing a nice garden from the seeds and plants that she had provided. 

She also let me know that much of the massive greenery in my flower pots was just hard to get rid of weeds. Oy!

High Class Stuff

A group oif tourists gathered in an upscale restaurant in New York City and ordered sandwiches and soft drinks.

When the waitress handed the bill to the man seated at the end of the table, he stood up with a surprised look on his face and exclaimed, "All we had were sandwiches and soft drinks."

The waitress calmly replied, "Sir, you have to pay for the ambiance too."

"All right," said the man turning to his friends, "which one of you ordered the ambiance!"

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