BREXIT!
A big mistake! In my humble opinion, leaving the European Union is not wise. And.. it doesn't help my stocks any... all down quite a bit today. But, I will not jump out of any windows. At least not yet. I wonder what this will do to Mr. Trump and his British finances... and his hidden Income Taxes.
Little Old Lady?
Today, I read a story written by a fellow Mensa member twenty or so years ago. (Name:? I'll let you know.) Anyway, this is the gist of the story:
A nice fragile little elderly lady lives alone. She takes care of her house carefully, trying not to tax her old bones. Her exercise is to rock on the front porch and to take out a small amount of trash every few days. She is a very pretty old lady who has a niece who comes to visit her and look after her important needs. In short, she is living the uneventful life of a typical senior citizen.
However, one day, she suddenly spots an interloper in her front room! A man with a gun pointed at her. He asks for her money or he says he will shoot her. Suddenly, the lady's bravery vibes jump up and overcome her fear vibes. She tells the man to look into her purse on the kitchen table and get money out of the pot on the high shelf in the kitchen.
While the man is getting the money, she reaches over and grasps her sugar jar. She sprinkles sugar all over the floor. Then she sits back in a sofa chair. A noise outside startles the crook and he comes running back into the front room, slipping and falling because of the sugar on the floor.
In the fall, he bangs his head against one of those doorstops that old ladies keep in their houses. This knocks him out. The lady looks at him and notices his bloody wound. She goes to the nearby cabinet, opens it up, and takes out a hammer. She comes back to where he is lying unconscious and mashes the wound spot hard with the hammer. Goodbye Mr. Crook.
She then takes the hammer to the sink, cleans it off, returns it to the drawer and takes a seat in the front porch rocker, waiting for somebody to walk by. Somebody she can call over to help her.
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This story reminded me of three things:
1. Remember my story about Walter and Richard, the bully team who punched and kicked me in the head when I was in Kindergarten? Do you remember how I solved that problem? Yes.. I put a nice round dent in Walter's head with a ballpean hammer while he and his brother were beating me up. Walter and his brother ran home crying for their mommy, and I never got bothered again.
2. Lizzie Borden took an ax,
And gave her mother 40 whacks.
When she saw what she had done,
She gave her father 41.
They never found the bloody ax, so in a case that sounded just like that of O.J., Lizzie was found innocent.
3. The new "Orange is the New Black"... well, you have to see the latest episodes. Will Lollie blab?
Computer Mistakes
M.K.Wolfe, in the Funny Times for June 2016, outlined some mistakes that software made when transcribing Medical Doctors' notes. Here are a few that I liked:
Doctor dictated: Dr. J. removed her pins.
Transcribed: Dr. J. removed her pants.
Doctor dictated: It was postponed due to logistics.
Transcribed: It was postponed due to lipstick.
Doctor dictated: The patient currently lives in a facility.
Transcribed: The patient currently lives in the Philippines.
Doctor dictated: The patient had a biopsy of his rectum.
Transcribed: The patient had a biopsy of his raccoon.
Easy Summertime Recipe
Miss Elaine's (Vaughan) Old Fashioned Cheese Ball
8 oz. cream cheese
1 stick margarine or butter
1/2 T. Maple Syrup
Garlic powder or garlic salt to taste
Cream all thogether
Roll in chopped nuts (peanuts, walnuts, or your choice)
(My son made this for a small party recently.. it tasted great!)
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