Music in my head today: Beethoven, I think. To assist my brain in it's musical pursuits, I normally listen to a lot of classical music each day, on FM or XM Radio. However, since Elaine has been ill, I try not to leave the radio on when I'm not in her vicinity, so that I can come to her assistance if she honks. Yes, honks. She has a goose call that she uses, because my crazy ears can hear that.
Elaine's other knee gave out today while I was at my NARFE meeting. She had to scoot on her butt to where her push-button was, and summon someone to help her get up. That is the second time this week that she has fallen.. both times a different artificial knee buckled. What do you do about that?
Crime against Seniors
One of my TRIAD buddies, Dean Brewer, of the Maryland States Attorney's Office here in Westminster, came to our NARFE meeting and gave a talk about scams against Seniors, and how to avoid them. I hope that the Answering Machine Holdouts took what he said to heart and decided to get answering machines and Caller-ID. I've been pushing for that for years... but do they listen? Only when they get scammed.. and they will eventually get scammed unless they protect themselves by not picking up their phones if they don't know the party that is calling them.
Yummy!
Our NARFE meetings are held at Bullock's Restaurant. This is a wonderful Country-style restaurant that serves the most delicious fried chicken that I have ever tasted. I always eat two of them and bring two back home for Elaine. They also make delicious peach turnover... lots of calories.. but I eat one and then try to watch what I eat the rest of the day. I've been counting my calories and Elaine's calories for a couple of months now. I've done that at times in the past, but have gotten bored after a while and given up. That is bad, because if I don't keep track of what we eat... we overeat... a lot!
However, I found a book with forms that are easy to fill out on a daily basis with the calories consumed counts. It also allows for keeping track of your weight. I think that I have lost maybe three pounds since I started counting calories again... not much... but better than gaining three pounds. And, of course, a procedure and lots of Lasix took 30 pounds of water out of my system, and I now can climb stairs without huffing and puffing.
Ice-cold Skinny Dipping
Our hero, Venice Fulton, diet guru, suggests that you weigh yourself in the nude, and of course, when you do, take time to use that special mirror to see if your fat butt is getting smaller. Venice also reminds us that being cold forces our bodies to lose energy.. and utilize BAT fat (Brown Adipose Tissue). And, the cold raises your metabolism...all day!
So, Venice sez: Jump out of bed... get naked... take a cold bath or shower.. and forget about breakfast. (However, the cold may affect your heart and blood pressure.. so be careful.)\
Venice, you seem like a nice guy, and I do want to lose some more weight.. but no way am I going to get out of warm bed, strip down and jump into a cold bath any time soon, (I don't care what those crazy Norwegians and Icelanders do) and, as I said, I do not intend to give up my breakfast. However, I do understand what you are saying, and of course it makes sense, but I don't think that Big Arnie or John Grimek ever followed this regimen, and think about how great they looked, all muscle and absolutely no fat.
Elderly Mama Again
Yesterday, I mentioned the 70 year old lady who had a baby recently. Today, our local newspaper posted a picture of the "happy" couple. (They are Indian Sikhs, and the father is 79.) They sure don't look happy; however, they went to a lot of trouble to get this baby, so their frowns must just be temporary, or, maybe they just realized that they would have to change diapers at their age.
I'm reminded of a famous French court case. An 80 year old man (can't remember who) was being accused of rape, and causing the resulting pregnancy of a young girl. Now, this was in France... remember that.. so when the witnesses all agreed that it had to be the old man who impregnated this girl, the courtroom went wild with loud praise for this fantastic Frenchman who was still a potent stud at such an advanced age. Encroyable! Congratulations! and "Case Dismissed!"
Does it Pay to Advertise?
According to Bill Engelhardt, this is supposed to be an actual ad placed in a Florida newspaper.
"FOXY LADY: Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 80's, slim, 5'4" (used to be 5'6"), searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion. Matching white shoes and belt a plus."
................................................................................................................................
No comments:
Post a Comment